Self confidence and fear

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

Self confidence and fear

What's the connection between self confidence and fear?
Do confident people feel afraid?

One of the readers of the website sent me the following question: "If courage is the ability to move forward with disregard to the felt fears then how can people claim that building self confidence reduces fears?"

The question is very logical because those points might seem contradictory when looking at them without putting other factors into consideration. In this article i will tell you about the connection between self confidence and fear.

Self confidence and irrational fears

If you felt afraid because a lion broke out of its cage and ran after you then you are a normal person. If you tried to save a little girl before the lion reaches her than you are considered a real brave person.

Being afraid in this case doesn't mean that you lack self confidence at all because after all fear in this situation is a healthy emotion that has the role of protecting you. (see Understanding your emotions).

The problem happens when you experience fear in an unhealthy way and in situations where fear is not needed. Its so normal to fear that lion but If you fear the other sex, public speaking or talking to strangers then your fears are not normal. (see Fear of approaching women and Why many women feel insecure)

Self confidence can help you become a better person by helping you get rid of your irrational fears.

Self confidence and the development of irrational fears

The important question that might have to came to your mind is "why would a person have such an irrational fear?"

Here are some examples that attempt to explain the relationship between self confidence and irrational fears:

  • Poor past experience: If a child was unfortunate enough to experience bad events that are related to a certain life field (for example social life) then he might develop irrational fears in that certain field. The little child who was always rejected by his friends might become socially withdrawn when he grows up. In this case his irrational fear prevented him from becoming self confident.
  • Limiting beliefs, self confidence and fear: In the Solid Self confidence program i said that the number one reason responsible for lack of self confidence is the formation of false beliefs. Not only will false beliefs reduce self confidence but they will result in irrational fears as well. If for example you believe that people are evil then certainly you will have good reason to fear them
  • Parenting style and fears: Do you know that a child can learn how to fear a certain situation by just watching his terrified parent going through the same situation? Just like self confidence fear can be learned at an early age if the parents didn't raise the child correctly. (see Top ten parenting mistakes)

Dealing with fears and building self confidence

In order to become really confident you need to first find out your irrational fears and the different life areas they are affecting.

Next you need to find out their root causes, are your fears caused by limiting beliefs? Did you learn them from your parents ....etc?

Finally you need to form an action plan to get rid of your fears that is based on the discoveries you made. Only then you will become really confident.

2knowmysef is not a complicated medical website nor a boring online encyclopedia but rather a place where you will find simple, to the point and effective information that is backed by psychology and presented in a simple way that you can understand and apply. If you think that this is some kind of marketing hype then see what other visitors say about 2knowmyself.

The Solid confidence program was launched by 2knowmyself.com; the program will either help you become more confident or give you your money back.

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