How to detach yourself from things

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

How emotional attachment makes your life miserable

If you want to forget about any person in few days then just visit the getting over anyone section. This article is not about getting over people for i already covered this topic thoroughly before but it's rather a one about learning to detach yourself from things that make your life miserable.

At any point of time you might be extremely attached to a job, a career, a goal or a thing in such a way that your life became intolerable. In my previous article Why being attached to anything is bad i explained how too much attachment to one thing can result in a wide array of bad emotions. Here are two of them:

  • 1) Intense worrying: The more you are attached to something the more worried you will get about losing it and this way of thinking might lead to a horrible life where you will worry almost all the time. See How attachment leads to worrying
  • 2) Severe depression: In case you lost that thing you are extremely attached to then you might get severely depressed. After all the intensity of depression is usually connected to the magnitude of attachment you had towards that thing you lost. See Why so many people are depressed.

What is meant by detachment

So many people might get detachment wrong by thinking that it's one form of giving up but that's totally wrong. There is no contradiction whatsoever between fighting for your goals and being detached from them. See also what to do when you feel like giving up

You can detach yourself from a goal that you fight for everyday and still keep fighting for it. The detachment process is not about ending the pursuit of something but it's all about being OK with the results you get.

Each person has got some things that they are extremely attached to. A typical person can't imagine their lives without those things and this is where bad emotions find their way to the person's life.

To detach yourself properly you must become 100% OK with losing what you have at least for a short while. For the first instance this sounds like a crazy thing. How can a person be fine with losing their job, home or career?

In fact this is 100% doable and that's not everything. Once you detach yourself from things you will experience great freedom and power in a way that you haven't experienced before.

Attachment makes you weak, emotional and worried. Detachment will make you strong, invulnerable and happy.

How to detach yourself from things

Here is how to detach yourself from things:

  • 1) Imagine your life without that thing: Find the thing you are attached to the most then imagine your life without thing that. Keep visualizing and imagining this new life until you find a way to adapt to it
  • 2) Create backup plans: Create backup plans that would allow you to live this new life without feeling really bad. Once your backup plan becomes tolerable to you being detached from things will become much easier
  • 3) Learn how to be flexible: Learn how to be totally OK with losing today in order to win tomorrow. Become flexible in such a way that you don't mind any type of life change. Teach yourself how to survive in new situations and conditions while working again to get back to the place you fell from. See How lack of flexibility leads to worrying problems

Yes it's not easy but it's very doable.

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Want to know more?

Why it's sometimes OK to give up

Are we really in control of our lives

7 Reasons you are smart but not rich

The desire to be in control promotes worrying

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