Why are some people very picky

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

I don't want this

Why are some people very picky?
And why don't those people settle easily for something?

Picky people are the ones who don't get into relationships or even buy items unless they find certain exact things that they are looking for. Just like any other behaviour being picky can happen for many different reasons or even a combination of some of those reasons.

In this article i will tell you about the major reasons that would make someone very picky. Note that one or more of those reasons can exist together to make the person picky.

Why are some people very picky

  • 1) Narcissism: Narcissists have a very big ego and as a result they try to project a superior identity to others. Based on the desire to maintain this superior identity Narcissists always look for partners who are perfect at least according to their own perception. This is why Narcissists become extremely picky when getting into relationships or buying anything. See also Why narcissists look so good and young
  • 2) The availability of many options: When a person has many options to choose from they automatically become more selective. It's a part of human nature that we become selective when we find that we have many things to choose from. A person who has many fans who like them will usually become very selective in choosing a life partner. See Why tinder is bad for your mental health , confidence and life & How the available options affect the relationship partner choice
  • 3) High level of knowledge: When a person knows exactly what they are looking for they are more likely to become picky. If you want to buy any smart phone then probably you will buy the first one you find but if you want a one with special specs because you are very aware of your needs then you are more likely to be picky. See Why you shouldn't go shopping with a person you don't want to marry
  • 4) Stubbornness & persistence: The more stubborn and persistent a person is the more likely they are to keep searching for what they want even if they can't find it. Those people who remain single for long periods of time might be very picky and stubborn people who won't settle except for what they want. See 10 reasons why elite people might be single
  • 5) High self concept: People who have a high self concept, a sense of entitlement or a high self esteem might become too picky because of believing that they deserve to be with a perfect partner. Those people might refuse to become flexible because of believing that they deserve what they are after. See also What causes feelings of entitlement & How your name affects your looks

Final words

The biggest problem with being picky is that we are not eternal beings. Yes there is a big advantage of not settling for what you don't want but don't also forget that time is passing fast.

Of course i am not asking you to lower your standards or to give up on the important things you want just because time is running but i am just asking you to be more flexible when it comes to the trivial matters that you can easily sacrifice.

Stay picky but don't over do it.

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