Why do narcissists get depressed

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

I was a narcissist

Most people don't quite understand depression and this is why they fail to treat it. Depression is not a simple disorder that happens the same way with each person but it's a complex disorder that happens based on many different variables including the person's beliefs and way of thinking. See Why your depression is not going away

In my previous article How i got over narcissism i explained how being a a Narcissist for a very long period of time has helped me understand that disorder perfectly from the inside.

The narcissist sees the world from a specific angle and this is why depression happens to them in a different way than normal people. Narcissists can get a very serious depression if life didn't go the way they expect it to go.

In this article i am going to explain to you how narcissists experience depression and why does this happen to them.

Why depression happens

Depression is nothing more than a state of loss of hope. This state happens when hope is lost towards achieving an extremely important life goal or psychological goal. See Why medications are no good for treating anxiety and depression.

Let's suppose that you badly wanted to be rich but you never did. In such a case probably you will get depressed if you believed that hope is lost. That was a very simple example because it's based on something very material that we can easily measure.

In many cases depression happens when a psychological need is not satisfied. If for example you have the need to be recognized as a successful person then you will get depressed if you lost hope in achieving that psychological goal. See What are the subconscious goals and how they affect your life.

In my book, The ultimate guide to getting over depression i said that the reason so many people fail to understand depression is that they fail to connect it with their important psychological goals.

Once the road towards reaching an important psychological goal becomes blocked depression happens.

Why do Narcissists get depressed

Narcissists have inflated egos and an inflated sense of self worth. Based on that image of grandiosity Narcissists believe that they deserve to get the best out of everything. See How Narcissists think

A typical Narcissist might believe they deserve to get the best job, spouse, house, car and life.
When the Narcissist approaches the world with such a mentality they face a serious problem which is that:

Life doesn't always go the way they wanted it to go.

A narcissist might thus find themselves living a mediocre life according to their own standards of grandiosity. If at any point the Narcissist became helpless and believed that they are stuck where they are then they will immediately become depressed. See Why your depression is not going away.

Moreover Narcissists enjoy it when they show off, become arrogant and display their strengths. Now if the Narcissist faced any big setbacks in their lives that deprived them of the privilege of being better than others then they might become very depressed.

In other words Narcissists feel great when they have things that make them think that they are better than others. Having a bigger house, a better job or a better car are among the things that can make a Narcissist feel really good.

Now if the Narcissist found themselves having the same things as others or even less then they might get seriously depressed.

For A narcissist being considered ordinary or average is a very unpleasant experience. If the Narcissist was sure that this is a temporary phase then nothing will happen but if they believed that they are stuck then they will certainly get depressed.

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