Why do people look at me

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

Eye contact has various meanings

I get many emails from people who are wondering why do others stare at them. Some people think that others are looking them because they find them weird while others think that people are looking at them because they like them.

When it comes to eye contact so many people get it wrong. They assume that it has a specific meaning that doesn't change but that's not correct.

Eye contact is just a normal behaviour that can happen because of so many different reasons. This means that people could be looking at you for various reasons and not for one specific reason.

In this article i will explain why people sometimes look at you so that you can figure out what's going on with them.

The different reasons for eye contact

Here are some possible reasons why people might be looking at you:

  • 1) They like your looks: That's one possible reason. If someone has a crush on you or if they just think that you are attractive then they might keep looking at you. People usually look more at the things they like. See How to know if someone likes you
  • 2) You look like someone they know: A person could stare at you because you look like someone they know or because you remind them of someone. In such a case the person might keep staring at you
  • 3) You are doing something unusual: Novelty always catches the attention of us humans. If you are doing something unusual or if you are wearing unusual clothes then people are more likely to stare at you. Any new, bizarre, unexpected or unusual thing can catch the attention of others easily
  • 4)They think you are interesting: If a person thinks that you are interesting then they will give you more eye contact than they give others. This interest does not have to mean that they like you but they could simply believe that you are interesting
  • 5) Random looks: So many people mistakenly think that others are looking at them intentionally where as a person could be looking around randomly and giving them some looks by coincidence. See Why do we mistakenly think that some people like us

How to figure out what's going on

As you just saw eye contact can have various meanings depending on the situation and so eye contact alone can't tell you what's going on.

This is why you must revert to the basic rule of body language which is that the presence of many signs that points to the same intention proves the intention true. In other words before you assume that people like you or dislike you just look at the other signs they are sending.

Once you find an alignment between some signs ,and not just one, then make sure you found something. human behaviour is very complex and can't be explained in the light of one or two possibilities but when you collect more evidence that points to the same direction then make sure that you found something meaningful.

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