Why it's sometimes OK to give up

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

The problem with goal setting

Goals can sometimes be extremely destructive.
Yes many goals can help you grow and achieve your potential but some other goals can turn your life into hell.
Some goals might only bring you pain, sadness, anxiety and depression.

We are all surrounded by a culture that glorifies success to the extent that some of us might ruin their lives in attempt to reach that level of success they are after.

But at some point you need to ask yourself very important questions.
Is that goal making you unhappy?
Are your goals ruining your life?
Or are they making your life better?

Some of those who earn well might be extremely sad because they are not millionaires while some millionaires might actually be depressed just because they are not billionaires. See Why millionaires get depressed & Why many millionaires don't feel rich.

The problem with goal setting is that it can sometimes prevent people from appreciating what they have. A person can set a goal and then strive to achieve it while forgetting to enjoy their life or to live some happy moments.

Many ambitious people live through hell because they have sacrificed every single good thing in their lives just to achieve some big goal. The ones who achieve those goals might find peace but those who don't achieve those goals end up losing everything.

They neither live a good life nor they get what they want.

The problem with ambition

Ambition is an extremely powerful force. If it was not channeled in the right direction then it will cause all kinds of intolerable emotions to the person.

And even when ambition is channeled in right direction the lack of results can torture the ambitious person and make their lives totally miserable. See Why ambitious people suffer more than everyone else.

The problem with over ambition is that it sometimes forces the ambitious person to risk everything just to gain one single thing that he might or might not gain.

Overly ambitious people can sometimes set impossible goals and thus end up living a life that depends solely on luck. Yes hard work can certainly pay off but we also have to admit that we are not 100% in control of life's events.

Our big goal might just be a very big gamble but we would never see it this way because of the way the world glorifies success stories. You read one of those success stories and you become 100% convinced that the person's actions helped them control the environment but the truth is that this level of control you are experiencing is a big illusion. See The illusion of control & How does luck work.

For the first instance we might seem like we are totally in control but when you look deeper you will find that we lack control even when it comes to the most basic things in our lives. Wake up one minute earlier or one minute late and you might come across a life changing event that makes your life totally different in the coming years.

You might feel like eating something one day but end up eating something totally different because of unexpected events. You might plan to do something in the morning but for some unknown reason the alarm never rings and so the events of that day change.

Yet we all want to believe that we are 100% in control because we want to think that we can achieve our extremely big goals by doing certain actions. See Why do we need to be in control.

Why it's sometimes OK to give up

If your goals are ruining your life then you must ask yourself the question: why am i trying to reach those goals in the first place?

You are trying to reach those goals in order to become happy yet you are ruining your life by not making them more realistic.

Sometimes it's totally OK to give up as long as the meaning of giving up is sorting your priorities and making your life happier.

Fight for your goals but don't let them ruin your life.
Give up on some and focus on the ones that won't make your life miserable.

The book The ultimate guide to getting over depression was released by 2knowmyself, the book provides a 100% guarantee for feeling better else you will be refunded.

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