Why you are still trapped in your past

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

The choice is always there

So many people believe that they are stuck where they are because of their past.
You ask those people why they aren't making any progress in life and then they start pointing fingers to their bad childhood, their abusive parents and their unpleasant past.

In my article Why most psychologists don't really help i said that there is a trend these days of labeling people with certain disorders then encouraging them to believe that there is no way out.

It's not uncommon these days to find a person who strongly believes that they will always live a bad life just because they were abused or mistreated in the past.

And of course this trend is total nonsense since it's based on nothing but lack of knowledge. Once you realize that any bad thing that happened in the past can be reversed by fixing the present then you will be set free.

You could for example get mistreated by your parents until you believe that you are worthless. In such a case no one can blame you for that because you were not responsible for it.

However this doesn't mean that you can't work on your self confidence and end up feeling good about yourself again. See also How to stop living in the past

Why you are still trapped in your past

So if the matter is that simple then why do so many people remained trapped in their past?

When a bad event happens to a person they will quickly try to find an explanation for it. The human brain was designed in such a way that it hates uncertainty and so it always demands explanations for things that are not clear. This is why you tend to think a lot about mysterious people or those who send you mixed signals. See Why being mysterious works

Now because past problems are big issues we do our best to find explanations for them and this is where the problem begins. Instead of realizing that we were dealing with unstable people, people who need help or even psychopaths we quickly assume that the problem was with us.

This is exactly why so many lose their self confidence because of their bad past. They assume that something was wrong with them and that this is why they were mistreated. When a person starts to think that way they become trapped in their past as a result of realizing that the problem was with them and not with others. See also How your past affects your present

How to break free from your past

To break free from your past you just need to do those simple steps:

  • 1) Realize that it was not you: The first thing you need to do to break free from your past is to realize that you were not responsible for any abuse that happened to you in the past. Once you make that realization a big part of your self confidence will come back to you
  • 2) Take responsibility for your life: Instead of labeling yourself with strange labels or assuming that you became defective because of your past know that you have the option right now to start fixing things and to make your life better. Yes the past was bad and you weren't responsible for it but you are still responsible for the choices you are going to make right now. See The causes of the fear of taking responsibility

The Solid confidence program was launched by 2knowmyself.com; the program will either help you become more confident or give you your money back.

Want to know more?

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