How to make a narcissist want you

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

I have been there

In my previous article How i got over narcissism i said i how was a typical Narcissist for many years before i managed to get over that disorder.

The fact that i have seen Narcissism from both the inside and the outside has given me a great insight about how a Narcissist thinks.

Narcissists are people with damaged egos who do their best to keep their ego protected from further hurt at all costs. Try to hurt a Narcissists' ego in any possible way and they will devalue you immediately. This might include shaming you, humiliating you, ignoring you or just blocking you out of their lives completely. See Why Narcissists hate you.

How to make a narcissist want you

So how can you make a Narcissist want you?

  • 1) Prove yourself Superior to others: When it comes to selecting a life partner Narcissists always look for people who seem like a catch. Narcissists usually look for people who can satisfy their big egos. This is why Narcissists might put very high weight to resources, looks, popularity and other materialistic things. The Narcissist will always want to be with someone who helps them project the image of grandiosity they want to project. This is why seeming like a catch is one of the things that can make a Narcissist truly fall for you
  • 2) Use social proof: Narcissists care to a great extent about the opinion of others. If they realized that many people think that someone is attractive then they will find that person 10 times more attractive. Narcissists want to be with someone who will help them seem successful and capable. This is why Narcissists can't resist popular people or those who seem to have many fans. See also Why narcissists look so good and young & Social proof theory
  • 3) Find out their love list: Narcissists usually make relationship decisions based on pure logic and hardly any emotions. This doesn't mean that Narcissists don't experience emotions but they just tend to rely more on logic when making a selection. Narcissists usually look for a specific list of things that must be found in a potential partner in order for them to satisfy their big egos. Your only chance with a Narcissist is to show them that you meet most of the items in their love list. See What is a love map & How to control a narcissist
  • 4) Never attack their egos: If you didn't respect a Narcissist or if you made them believe that you do not see them in the glorious way they see themselves then you are very likely to lose them. Narcissists strive to maintain an image of superiority and so if someone tried to challenge this image the Narcissist will get rid of them immediately. See Why narcissists don't give closure & Why are narcissists so dangerous
  • 5) Narcissists look for trophy spouses: Many Narcissists will look for a trophy spouse in order to enhance their public image or to maintain the kind of image they have created for themselves. If you want a Narcissist to love you then you need to seem like this kind of rare trophy. This sounds very Materialistic i know but it's also very true. See Why narcissists ignore you & What makes a person a narcissist
  • 6) Seem more valuable than them: Once a Narcissist believes that you are more valuable than them in any possible way they will get attached to you. Narcissists always care about displaying a superior social image and so when they find someone who can help them do that they immediately fall in love with them. See also Why narcissists look so good and young

The book How to make someone fall in love with you was released by; the book will dramatically increase your chance of letting someone fall in love with you.

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