Overcoming shyness

Help Me! I'm Shy!

If shyness is your major problem in life, then you are a lucky person because shyness is one of the easiest personal defects to get over. When you are shy, you just tend to avoid talking or interacting with people as much as possible so as not to get embarrassed or say something that they may not like. Although you may still enjoy their company, you hardly say a word while being with them, that’s if you even actually talked at all.

Overcoming shyness

Your shyness may be due to many reasons. The following is a list of tips on how to overcome shyness:

Practice. If you think that this is not worth mentioning, then you must understand that this is the most powerful method for overcoming shyness. Practice talking to people who you don't know well or even people that you don't know at all!! If you are a shy person, then you probably feel that it’s hard to go and approach someone that you don't know to ask for something. It seems very hard because you didn't try hard enough to do it, so start from now to force yourself to talk under any circumstance. Even with your friends, try to talk more than what you are used to. It will be hard at first, but as long as you keep trying it’s going to be easier and easier. What's amazing is that some people tend to turn totally to the other side after practicing, they become very social people!! It’s all about training and practicing!!
Sometimes underlying this shyness is an inferiority complex(feeling inferior compared to your peers) that was created during childhood and stayed there in your mind. In this case removing shyness requires an additional step of getting rid of that inferiority complex. By the way, if you only practice without getting rid of the inferiority problem you will still succeed to become a social person, but behind the scenes you will still be feeling inferior although no one might notice it.
One of the famous causes for shyness is lack of self confidence, you may be afraid to talk because you are not sure what other people are going to think of you and whether they are going to like what you are about to say. The solution is simple, just start from now to build your self confidence and you will overcome shyness in no time. One thing that is related to self confidence is putting people first even before your own wants, you may be trying to please everybody and so you analyze what you’re going to say hundreds of times in order to make sure that everyone around will like it, wake up!! This is not a perfect world!! you can't make everyone like you or like what you’re saying because whatever it is that you are going to say might appeal to some people and yet not to others. Try to think in a different way other than following perfectionism blindly
One other thing that plays a big role in being shy is negative self talk.Self talk are the things you say and words you use when talking to yourself. Examples of negative self talk are "I won’t talk now, they will laugh at me" or "I know they’ll get bored if I told them that story". Having positive self talk instead of negative is not that hard, you just need to use a method called CBT(Cognitive Behavior Therapy), this method will help you control your thoughts and your negative self talk and this in turn will lead to controlling your unwanted behavior (shyness in this case).

2knowmysef is not a complicated medical website nor a boring online encyclopedia but rather a place where you will find simple, to the point and effective information that is backed by psychology and presented in a simple way that you can understand and apply. If you think that this is some kind of marketing hype then see what other visitors say about 2knowmyself. The book “How to get over someone in few days” was released by 2knowmyself, the book is a 100% guarantee that you will get over anyone else you will be refunded.

Did that help?

Yes, but why can't I please everyone?

Yes, I feel inferior, what to do ?

Not until you tell me how to build my self confidence

I want to know more about self talk