We Don’t Resist Change, We Resist Change We Don’t Like

Why do we resist change

I have read so many articles about how hard it is to change—that it is this long arduous process that takes a huge emotional or physical toll, but the truth is that people change all the time and even welcome it. Think about it. How many people do you know who have left their home, got married and had children-- all major life changes. How about work? Do you know anyone who has resisted a promotion, a cubicle by the window or a higher salary? It is not change that we resist.

It is those changes that we don’t like that we resist. You see, there has to be a positive outcome of the change for us to embrace it. If it takes too much effort, requires too much time and is too high a risk, it is logical that we would resist it.

Let's say for example that your company has just announced that it will be outsourcing all of its computer support over the next couple of months. The change would only impact those that supported the company’s computer systems.

First, they would be left knowing that there job was about to end and have to deal with the shock of that and then they would have to spend time looking for another job (in a poor economy), lose their salary, work community and the familiarity of their job. (see also When should i quit my job)

You resist change when it directly affects you

So, if you were one of the unfortunate ones, the chances of your liking the company's decision to outsource their computer support function are slim to none; However, if you work in the company's marketing department, you may not care as much about the company outsourcing its computer support.

But then again, you have to think that if they are willing to outsource one department, they may be willing to outsource another. You know, at one of those company meeting where a high-profiled person in the company stands in front of a podium with a fancy presentation and talks about all of the wonderful changes that are going to be taking place—one being that your job has been eliminated?

Why Else do we resist change

But there is another reason that we resist change. We resist it from people who don’t like us. What if you have a manager that doesn't particularly care for you?

He or she hasn't come right out and said it, but you have enough evidence from the way he or she speaks to you at staff meetings and passing him or her in the hallways to know that for sure. Do you think that you will be receptive to changes he or she plans to make that affect your job? I think not!

It is damn near impossible to accept change from someone that doesn't like you. As people, our number one fear is rejection and those who don't like us are clearly rejecting us. We don't feel like we can trust them (rightfully so). Who knows what ill-talking, plotting, manipulating, gossiping, backstabbing or other things that could be going on?

It is not that you don’t like change, you don’t like changes that are not in line with the life you want to create for yourself and there is nothing wrong with that.

This post was written by Lisa H. (aka RunningBear) is the founder of Getting to Zen – inspiring personal success one bold move after another. Be sure to sign up for her Personal Development Toolbox and download her free eBook Getting to Success.