The Ultimate Source for Self Understanding , getting more than 300,000 visits each month

why do things never work for you

Have you ever wondered: "Why do things never work for me? Why do I never succeed while others do? Why do some people reach their goals, while others don't? " I bet most of you have asked yourselves those questions before. Have you ever started doing a certain activity, but after trying a couple of times, decided that it was too hard for you?

Maybe you thought that you lack the qualities needed to perform the required activity. Or maybe you've done like most people, and started complaining about your bad luck, the weak economy and all of the other external conditions that affect you.

its only about the number of tries

But the truth here is totally different, life has proved that anyone can achieve anything that he wants, given that he tried hard enough. "But how hard is hard enough ?" You may wonder...

Here's an example. Let's say that you need to fall about one hundred and fifty times before you can reach a certain level of proficiency in skating. Let's assume that you only tried one hundred and ten times. You might stop trying and call yourself a failure because you fell 110 times. But if you knew the truth - that you were only 40 trials away of achieving your goal - you wouldn't have stopped then.

Off course, there isn't any known constant number of trials that you need to complete for every activity - because the number of required trials depends on your skills.

Take the skating example. If you were very skilled at sports, with good feet co-ordination and balance, you may need to fall twenty or thirty times only before you could do it well. An average person may need seventy trials, while someone with zero sports background may need to try more than a hundred times. But in the end, after all did their required trials, they are all capable of skating!

still not convinced?

If you're still not convinced, just go ahead and read the those few examples:

Thomas Edison failed nine hundred ninety nine times before he succeeded at inventing the lamp. On the 1000th trial!!! When he was asked how he managed to continue trying in spite of failing all those times, he told them: "Whenever it didn't work, I would never say that I failed. I just say that I've found another incorrect way to make the lamp".

Another story regarding sports, it was previously thought that a man can never run a mile in less than 4 minutes. That belief was there for years, that no one ever dared to doubt its correctness. That was until Roger Banister proved that this was not true, by running a mile in less than 4 minutes. Just after that in the same year another 37 runners broke the record, followed by hundreds later.
What's interesting here is that if anyone of those runners had tried hard enough before Banister, he could have done it. But they all gave up to the belief and didn't try enough times because they thought trying was useless in this case. "Why bother with something impossible ?" they thought.

More examples: Henry Ford lost all of his fortune 6 times, and each time he did bounce back and rebuild his empire.
Walt Disney's idea of creating a cartoon character called "Mickey Mouse" was rejected more than 5 times, until he managed to find someone who supported the idea and then Mickey came to life.
English novelist John Creasey got 753 rejection slips before he published 564 books.

do you think they were exceptions?

If you think that this happened only to those people then you are totally wrong; it did happen to all of us before!! many times!!
Let me give you an example. When you were a kid learning how to walk, How many times did you fall down? How many times did you try to stand up but couldn't do it?

If you were exposed to that situation with the mentality that you have now, maybe you were going to whine about life becoming so hard, and that babies can't walk easily these days, and parents not giving us the required support that we want when we ask them (chocolate maybe?). Or maybe you would have thought that other kids are going to laugh at me because I can't walk. I will stop trying.

Funny but true, so let's take a look at this situation deeply. Why didn't you give up here? Why did you keep trying until you did it? Simply because at that time you had not yet learned how to give up, or how to blame the circumstances for everything that you fail to achieve. Or maybe you still had not learned to get depressed when you face an unsolved problem.

Enough with babies, let me give you a more recent example.
When you started to learn how to drive, how many times did you fail to make the car move forward? or how many times did the car suddenly stop from you while driving? Do you remember the people yelling at you because you were blocking the road with your car, and you couldn't do anything about it?

This also happened to all of us, and the question here is the same, why you kept trying again and again until you became someone who can drive while listening to the stereo and maybe eating at the same time?

The answer is that most probably you just saw everybody driving successfully and you never saw someone who is learning how to drive and failing and calling it terms like "difficult" and "impossible".
So you knew you could do it, and you didn't give up until you learned how to drive. But what's amazing here is that driving is one of the most difficult activities a person can learn, did you notice how you need to move both of your legs and hands in different directions at the same time! You are controlling your four limbs at the same time, each one in a different direction! Moreover, you are using your mind to concentrate and to make calculations, estimates and decisions in order to follow a certain route, stop at a precise location and avoid hitting something.

Persistence is the key to getting what you want

The conclusion that we've reached here is just one of the laws of life that God created. If you kept trying and trying you will reach what you want, whatever it is. As for people who don't achieve in life, they aren't people who didn't have the resources to reach their goals - but they are people who gave up so early while they were just about to reach what they wanted.
Like a farmer who planted the seeds, poured the water, waited and waited and nothing happened, so he left. Hours later, the green plant showed up, but there was no one left to take care of it, so it died.

"I Can't Do It" Is never the truth, It's Your Decision.

2knowmyself is not a simple article website nor it’s a place where you will find shallow fixes, but it’s a place where you will find effective techniques that are backed by psychology and that are presented in obvious and understandable format. If you think that this is some kind of marketing hype then see what other visitors say about 2knowmyself.The book How to make someone fall in love with you was released by 2knowmyself.com; the book will dramatically increase your chance of letting someone fall in love with you.

Did this help?

That's great, but trying the same thing over and over may not be effective

but why do i sometimes have the will, and then lose it midway?

ok i agree, but i lost hope, is there any way to restore it so that i could start again?

No,sometimes unexpected events happen and so i just feel down

Bookmark/Search this post with:

delicious | digg | reddit | newsvine | technorati | Facebook