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Do soul mates really exist?

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

Do soul mates really exist?

He was my soul mate. I can never forget about him
life is meaningless after i broke up with my soul mate
Soul mates never fight and they always end up together.

I know that these phrases sound familiar. I always get similar messages from readers of 2knowmyself. Many people ask me whether soul mates really exist or whether the concept is just a myth.

My opinion about such a topic might not matter because it might be based on my own view of the world however what matters the most is what psychology says about the existence of soul mates.

In this article i will tell you whether soul mates really exist or not based on psychology's opinion.

The existence of soul mates, fact or myth

This example will tell you whether soul mates exist or not. When Sarah was young she didn't get any attention from her distant father. Sarah grew up believing that she is not that important but because that belief would have hurt her emotions if it was brought to her consciousness it was buried inside her subconscious mind.

One day Sarah met that handsome guy who was really kind to her and who in the same time had similar face features to her father. Even though she didn't realize the similarity she started to think that this guy is her soul mate.

Sarah has been watching romantic movies since she were 12 and she thought that this guy is her soul mate because the feelings she got was really similar to the ones she saw in the movies. For Sarah, soul mates existed without doubt but was this belief true?

Why soul mates don't exist

In fact Sarah loved the guy and even thought that he is her soul mate because he helped her satisfy one of the very important needs she had. She always wanted her father to care for her and now she met someone who looks like her father who can take care of her.

That's not the end of the story, Sarah and her soul mate (at least according to her own perception) ended up together. Sarah startedbuilding her self confidence after she joined a 6 month confidence building course and there she was taught to feel good about herself even if no body appreciated her.

Suddenly and without understanding why that soul mate became less attractive to her and she was really wondering why is she losing interest in the relationship even though she found her soul mate!!

The soul mate concept is a non existent myth

In my article Love psychology i said that we fall in love with others to satisfy our unmet needs, to compensate for our weaknesses and to avoid the problems that happened to us in the past then believe that we found our soul mate.

Soul mates exist but only in movies! As a result of the movies you have been watching since your childhood you were programmed to believe in the existence of soul mates and that's why:

  • You don't recover fast from breakups: In my book How to get over anyone in few days i explained how false beliefs such as the soul mate hinder recovery from breakups.Certainly anybody who believes in the soul mate concept will never recover from a breakup simply because he will be sure that he won't find anyone to replace his soul mate!
  • You make the wrong choices: Sarah thought that this guy is her soul mate ,even though he was a bad person, just because she felt unloved. As soon as she satisfied this need by building self confidence she forget about her soul mate and even broke up with him! (see 3 reasons you don't feel loved
  • You become disappointed Many people don't just believe in the existence of the soul mate myth but they even believe that soul mates don't fight, that they always end up together and that they never breakup. I am sure you can now guess how living with unrealistic beliefs in a realistic world results can ruin your life

In short, sorry to disappoint you but soul mates don't exist. We fall in love with people when they meet our subconscious criteria which is a list of conditions present in our minds that is based on our pasts, unmet needs and the desire to compensate for our weaknesses.

2knowmysef is not a complicated medical website nor it's a boring online encyclopedia but it's a place where you will find simple, to the point and effective information that is backed by psychology and that is presented in a simple and obvious way. If you think that this is some kind of marketing hype then see what other visitors say about 2knowmyself.The book "How to get over someone in few days" was released by 2knowmyself, the book is a 100% guarantee that you will get over anyone else you will be refunded.

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