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social approval and self confidence

do you find it very hard to be criticized by someone even if its a constructive criticism?
do you feel real bad when someone rejects you or dislikes even if you have other people who do care about you?
do you try to please everyone around you at the cost of your own happiness?
do you pick clothes that are most likely to be liked by other people around or do you always follow the latest fashion just because its a fashion and not because you like it?

if most of your answers were yes, then you are fighting to get social approval, people who are after social approval usually do their best to please everyone around so that they can be accepted by their society .

what's the problem with trying to be approved?

the problem with social approval is that it tends to make you lose your identity in order to appeal to other people. it also makes your self confidence and your self worth externally Dependant on what do other people think of you and on other factors. if people were happy enough today to complement you then you think that you are worthy , and if people were in a bad mood not to talk to you in a good way you think that you are worthless. and that in turn results in a corrupted self confidence and a poor self image.

the cause for fighting for social approval

if the you did have a feeling of inner self worth and a feeling of being valuable then you are less likely to fight for social approval. that is because most of the time fighting for social approval is a result of an inner feeling of inferiority and of being inadequate and so some kind of a clue must be externally found to proof that you are worthy.

what to do in case you fight for social approval

if this is how you act, its time to know that your value and your worth can only be determined by you and that leaving your self confidence to be externally Dependant will result in a yoyo like self confidence that goes up when people approve you and down when they don't, you will live at the mercy of their kindness you may even give up your own satisfaction in exchange for their satisfaction.

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did that help ?

No,sometimes i do something because everyone around is doing it

yes but what do you mean by losing my identity ?

i guess my problem is that i feel inferior to my peers

hmmm, i guess i have self confidence problems