Perfectionist Definition

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

Who is the perfectionist

A perfectionist is someone who sets extremely high standards then expects to achieve them. Because those standards are far from being achievable the perfectionist usually ends up lacking self confidence.

Here are some Examples of the standards the perfectionist sets for himself:

  • Ill never make mistakes
  • Everyone should love me
  • I will get the full mark at all exams all exams
  • I must do everything perfectly

based on that way of thinking the perfectionist feels very ashamed when he makes a mistake and this causes more damage to his self confidence. The biggest reason the perfectionist thinks that way is that he forget one very important fact about himself which is that he is a human being!!

In the Solid Self confidence program i explained how perfectionism is one of the main reasons behind lack of self confidence. The perfectionist strives for perfection all the time and with every failure his self confidence drops a little more until he ends up with no self confidence.

Shouldn't i try to be perfect?

Not being a perfectionist doesn't mean that you shouldn't try to do your best.
You should do your best and know that as humans we can't be perfect and that we make mistakes.

Once you understand that its OK to fail,to make mistakes and to even act stupid sometimes your self confidence will get a strong boost. I previously said that some people lack self confidence because they keep lowering their self esteem each day using their incorrect thinking patterns.

Sometimes a person becomes a perfectionist as a result of suffering from an inferiority complex. When someone feels inferior he might become a perfectionist in order to hide his defects from others.

The perfectionist thinks that if he was able to appear perfect in front of others then they might never discover his real flaws.

Dealing with perfectionism

Lets suppose that you discovered that you are trying to be perfect because you are afraid that people think that you are incompetent.

In such a case you don't need to deal with perfectionism directly but you have to fix the beliefs that made you think that people will judge you in a bad way just because you made some mistakes.

In other words, in order to get rid of perfectionism you need to get rid of the incorrect beliefs that caused it.

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