Building self confidence by impressing your subconscious mind

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

Why the traditional advice don’t work

If this is not the first article you read about building self confidence then most probably you have read advice such as "keep repeating affirmations", "stop your negative self talk" and "don’t care about the opinion of other people".

The problem with such advice is that they never reach your subconscious level and that's why a part inside you will still feel worthless even if you did them. The only way to build self confidence is to reach that subconscious part inside you and convince it that you deserve to be confident.

Building self confidence and the inner judge

Imagine that there is a small person living inside you whose job is to judge you and evaluate you. If this person thought that you are worthless then you started repeating affirmations and saying that you are great he will reply telling you “No you are a liar”

In Solid Self confidence program i said that the only way to convince that inner judge, which is your subconscious mind, is to bring some kind of evidence to him.
But before you do so you must first ask him, why does it consider you worthless?

Lets suppose that the answer was “You don’t have friends” then the evidence you are going to bring must be in the form of new friends you make, only then you will feel confident.

Do you know why you feel confident when you wear new clothes?
It's because your subconscious mind believes that you are good looking. In other words when the belief comes from within it becomes hard for external sources to affect it. Now when you convince your subconscious mind that are truly worthy then no matter what happens this belief will stay intact.

Now compare this to wearing clothes that you don't like because they look odd for example. No matter what others tell you about how good you look you will still feel uncomfortable simply because your mind believes that there is something wrong with you.

Building self confidence the wrong way

The reason most people spend years trying to build self confidence with no results is that they take the wrong path. A person who has a problem with his social life might try to fix it by becoming successful in his job and vice versa.

This guy is providing the wrong evidence and that’s why his subconscious mind never believes him.(see The relationship between success and self esteem).

Try to understand the real reasons that are preventing your subconscious mind from believing in you and this will give you a clue about the type of evidence you should provide in order for it to believe in you.

Once your subconscious mind believes in you the opinion of others won't matter much. This is why confident people remain confident even after people criticize them and say bad comments about them. This is also why you obsess so much when a negative comment is said to you because in such a case this comment just approved a negative belief that your subconscious mind already had.

Self confidence can’t be built by using affirmations or positive thoughts but it can only be built through convincing your subconscious mind that you are worthy.

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