Rebound Relationships Advice

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

What is a Rebound Relationship?

A rebound relationship is a relationship that occurs shortly after a break-up. The person seeking a rebound relationship usually does so to compensate for the gap that his old partner left.

Rebound relationships can also occur just before the break-up when it becomes clear that the current relationship is ending soon. In this case the main purpose of the rebound relationship is to prevent the person from experiencing the pain that occurs after break-ups.

Rebound Relationships & Love Addiction

Some people seek rebound relationships because they are addicted to love. They want someone to take care of them, make them feel worthy and prevent them from feeling lonely.

While these may sound like good goals still they are clear signs of relationship addiction. When you fall in love just to stop feeling lonely or to feel worthy then its not real love but its just a method you are using to improve your mood and to cope.

One of the main causes of rebound relationships is love addiction. If the person was a love addict then losing the source of nurturing he got used to will trigger withdrawal symptoms which will lead to the desire of starting a rebound relationship. The subconscious mind in this case tries to find the person a new relationship in order to make him feel good again and the result is a short lived rebound relationship.

Rebound Relationships & Self Worth

Sometimes people seek rebound relationships just to prove to themselves that they are worthy especially when they are not the ones responsible for the break-up. Finding someone who loves them back as soon a relationship ends can be a strong proof that they are worthy of being loved. (see Reasons you don't feel loved)

Seeking a rebound relationship to feel worthy can happen on the conscious or the unconscious level. When it happens on the conscious level you will find yourself aware of your goal (which is restoring your self worth) on the other hand when this happens unconsciously you will suddenly find yourself in a new rebound relationship and you will even think that this new person is the One.

Rebound Relationships & Escaping the Pain

If you don’t know how to deal with a break-up and if your emotions always take over you when you end a relationship then most probably you will have more tendency towards getting into rebound relationships.

In this case, the main aim of the rebound relationship will be preventing you from experiencing the pain that could result from the old break-up. (see 9 Ways to get over a breakup fast)

Rebound Relationships Advice

After a break-up an intense emotional instability is experienced especially with women. this instability can result in incorrect decisions that lead to short lived rebound relationships. I am not saying that all rebound relationships have no future but definitely a relationship that started on the basis of emotional stability will have a much better chance of survival than a rebound relationship.

My advice for you if you just broke up or got divorced is to wait. Even if you felt like wanting to start a new relationship give yourself some more time before you do it.

When you get into a rebound relationship you will always be making comparisons between your old partner and the new one and what usually happens is that the old one wins then you find yourself obligated to end this new relationship too because you have no real feelings towards that person.

If you learned how to overcome love addiction you will only start a new relationship when you have real emotions towards someone and not when you want to feel good or to prove that you are worthy. My opinion about rebound relationships is that they will always be short lived and will rarely succeed; give yourself some more time before starting a rebound relationship because the only action that can never cause any problems is patience.

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