Why do Some People Have Trouble Showing Affection

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

Don't get people wrong

The worst mistake you can ever make when trying to understand people is to group them by behaviour. When you assume that all people who do a certain behaviour have the same intetions then know that you are getting very far away from understanding the human nature.

The same behaviour can exist among many humans but each of them could have a totally different reason for doing that behaviour. Some people don't have any problems showing affection but others seem to have a problem sharing their emotions that way.

As usual there are many possibilities for this lack of desire to show affection. In this article i will talk about the most common reasons that could lead to such a behaviour.

Why do Some People Have Trouble Showing Affection

  • 1)They consider it weakness: For some people showing their emotions is considered a weakness. Those people might have been raised to believe that only weak people reveal their emotions and as a result they developed the habit of hiding their emotions.
  • 2) Their parents never loved them: When a child is deprived of love by his parents or caregivers then he might have problems displaying affection later on. Not all people who get deprived of things fail to give them to others but in many cases it happens See how parenting styles impact children
  • 3) They aren't emotional: Many men aren't as emotional as their women want them to be. Some women also aren't that emotional. People who aren't emotional , and who are usually very practical, don't display affection because its just the way they are
  • 4) Shyness: Many people are too shy to express their emotions especially when it comes to affection. Those shy people might have serious problems expressing their emotions or showing their affection
  • 5) They aren't really interested: This is sometimes the case. If a person isn't really in love with someone else then he might have problems displaying affection as he will feel that he is faking it.

How to deal with such people

The previous 5 cases were among the most popular ones but there could be other cases. In order to deal with a person who has troubles showing his affection you need to first find out the reason behind his behaviour. As you might have already guessed the right way to deal with that person will depend upon that reason you will find.

If for example the person didn't want to display affection because he was raised that way then you can help them change gradually and slowly. See how to change a perosn using words

Forcing it out never works

Many couples fight when one of them doesn't show enough affections. The problem with such fights is that they never work because the person who doesn't show affection is just being himself. When you try to force that person to be somebody he isn't , through a fight, then certainly he will fail to do it.

That person will feel so fake as he tries to force himself to do something that he doesn't really feel or understand. This is why fighting over that reason is wrong but instead using patience and gradual encouragement is the best way to do it.

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