By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

The difference between saying i failed and i am a failure

There is a great difference between saying "I failed" and saying "I am a failure". In the first statement you left room for improvement by describing the situation itself while in the second one you damaged your self confidence and self image by making an assumption that you are inadequate.

Instead of believing that you are a person who lost you assumed that you are a loser and instead of believing that you are a person who failed you assumed that you are a failure.

the problem with labels

The problem with such labels is that they make you believe that you are faulty, inadequate or incompetent and as a result your self confidence will be severely affected.

If you were walking down the street wearing torn clothes and upon passing by two bystanders they started to whisper to each other while looking at you, the first thing that will come to your mind is that they were talking about you. The subconscious mind can turn your beliefs into reality by helping you get what you focus on" and that's why labels are really dangerous.

On the other hand if you bought a new shirt that looks good and the same situation happened you may think that those people were talking about how nice your shirt looked.

In fact both of these thoughts may have never existed and maybe the bystanders were talking about something else other than you but because your mind gets what you focus on you believed that they were talking about you.

Now What do you think will happen if you walked down the streets believing that you are a loser? Every event that you will experience will be interpreted by your mind to prove to you that you are a loser!!

Challenge your labels

Many people suffer from low self confidence because of the labels they formed when they were young. As a result of being called names such as dumb, foolish or stupid those people grew up carrying these labels and thus started to believe that they are less worthy than others.

Now that you understand the dangers of labels never call yourself names but instead describe the situation that happened to you properly.

Getting rid of labels by taking actions

Sometimes the best thing you can do to get rid of a label is to take an action. Lets suppose that you believed that you are a total failure.

In such a case changing this label might require moving against your emotions and succeeding at doing anything. As soon as you achieve this success this label will be rejected by your subconscious mind.

The hard part here is trying and trying even though you think that you are a failure. Many people mistakenly believe that all beliefs can be changed by talking instead of taking actions and in many cases this is completely wrong.

If you want to get rid of a label then do something to prove it wrong.

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