Why do people ignore others

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

Why do people ignore others

Lots of people feel bad when someone ignores them because they gain their self esteem from the approval of others. When we were young children we were taught to please grown ups in order to be “Nice” children.

As we grew up our strategy for seeking approval remained the same and so we started to determine our worth based on the acceptance we get from others, If people liked us then we feel good about ourselves and if they ignored us we feel worthless.

The only way to break free from this dependency on the judgment of others is to learn why people ignore others. After you do so you will find that in most cases you weren’t ignored because you were bad but rather because of other factors that aren't related to you.

Why do people ignore others

The main reason people feel bad when someone ignores them is that they think that they were ignored because something was wrong with them, however, the following list of reasons will show you lots of reasons that could make people ignore you and that has no connection to your worth:

  • Interested in someone else?: In my book How to make someone fall in love with you I explained how we fall in love with people based on a criteria we have in our minds that is based on our past experiences. This means that a person could be interested in someone else just because his past experiences forced him to become attracted to certain type of people (who might be less attractive than you).
  • Over doing it is a Good sign: Did someone delete you from MSN, erased your number or didn’t say hi even though your eyes met? This is an indication of a revenge attempt!! A normal person simply wouldn’t care about causing harm to someone unless he is trying to avenge himself! That person who deleted you was so concerned about what you did to him to the extent that he took an aggressive action in order to feel better!!
  • Mixed signals: In my article how to know if someone likes you I explained how being treated nicely one day then being ignored the other day could be a great indication that someone likes you. When a person feels he was overly nice without getting a good response then he will pull back and act cold.
  • What does not interested mean?: In my article dealing with boredom I said you might not be interested in something not because its boring but because your current emotional state makes you in need of something else. You might find yourself interested in doing something then few hours later find yourself interested in doing something else, does this mean that first thing was boring? No it only means that your mood changed
  • Hatred is always good: A person only hates someone if he harmed him and if in the same time he didn't know what to do to defend himself. Jealousy, resentment, stored anger and lack of self confidence could all be very strong reasons for hatred. Hatred is sometimes expressed in the form of ignoring the other person or trying to show him that he is worthless. see I hate him

Feeling bad when others ignore you

We can summarize all of the previous information into two points. People can either ignore you on intention or without intention.

1)In case they are ignoring you on intention then make sure that if you weren’t important to them they wouldn’t have cared to take extra actions to make you feel bad.

2)In case they were ignoring you without intention then know that being interested in someone else doesn’t mean that anything is wrong with you, it only means that these people are prisoners of their past which forces them to be with certain people.

2knowmysef is not a complicated medical website nor a boring online encyclopedia but rather a place where you will find simple, to the point and effective information that is backed by psychology and presented in a simple way that you can understand and apply. If you think that this is some kind of marketing hype then see what other visitors say about 2knowmyself.The book How to make someone fall in love with you was released by 2knowmyself.com; the book will dramatically increase your chance of letting someone fall in love with you.

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