How to deal with worrying

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

How to deal with worrying

She was standing in the middle of the street and shouting at her friends
For those who don't have a deep knowledge about the human mind she appeared to be bad tempered

But to someone who knows how to look behind the causes of the human's behavior it was clear that she was worried about something

Our friend was worried about being left behind in a country that is new to her and that's why she lost her temper. Had she learned how to deal with worrying she wouldn't have acted that way.

Anger, sarcasm and worrying

The way a person acts is always a refection of the emotions he is experiencing. Most people fail to understand others because they never manage to relate their behavior to the correct emotion.

Anger for example can be the result of being worried about something or feeling insecure. When the person finds that he has lost control over a certain situation he might become angry in order to protect himself. After all if he managed to regain some control by forcing people to obey him then he would feel more secure.

Worrying can also result in sarcastic behavior. If the person felt insecure and so started worrying he might criticize people who don't understand his worries in order to force them to empathize with him.

The first step to dealing with worrying is to understand that some of the incorrect behavior you are doing such as losing your temper might be a direct result of worrying.

How to stop worrying?

  • You can't just stop worrying: I am sure you came across lots of nonsense advice such as "just stop worrying". The reason such advice would never work is that worrying is just a message your subconscious mind is sending you to tell you that you are not in control and that being in control is important to you. You can't just ignore the message, and if you did, it will intensify and you will become even more worried
  • Learn how to accept uncertainty: Two different people might face the same exact situation and end up with completely different emotions. In the Solid Self confidence program i said that the combination of your belief system and the situation you are facing shapes your behavior. If you want to deal with worrying then you must work on changing your beliefs about being in control. You must learn how to embrace uncertainty and to remain calm in situations that have unpredictable outcomes
  • Take Action and stop worrying!!: If worrying is just a message from your subconscious mind then certainly responding to the message would make you feel relieved. If you were worried about a job interview then call experts and ask them about the questions you might be asked, This would help you feel more relaxed. In short, taking actions can reduce your worries

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