Getting Over Embarrassment

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

A very Embarrassing Situation

She was in a hurry because she was late by more than 15 minutes. While she was running towards her car she suddenly slipped over and fell in the mud.

With dirt covering all of her clothes she felt very embarrassed. She looked at the eyes of those people around her, saw their smiles and wished that she had never got out of her house that day.

Will you Feel Embarrassed too?

What if you were in her shoes? What if this situation happened to you? Will you feel embarrassed too? will you Blush???

Some people have the problem of getting embarrassed easily to the extent that a simple situation like the one above can make them hide in their homes for few days until others forget about it. In fact if you knew a little more about psychology you will discover that this situation should never make you embarrassed.

Embarrassment Explained

Embarrassment is a feeling experienced when doing something you think that people won't accept while being watched. From the definition its clear that we are all victims of the norms and the traditions our Society created, right?

No that's not right at all because you will only feel embarrassed if you thought that what you did was something embarrassing even if others considered it pretty normal.

Don’t you see babies running around naked without feeling embarrassed? Why don’t these babies feel embarrassed when they do so and why do most adults feel embarrassed when their pants fall down during running?

the answer is simple, embarrassment is 100% dependent on your own view of the situation and not on what other people think.

Embarrassment and making Mistakes

So why did the girl feel embarrassed when she fell in the mud?
Simply because she had learned a limiting belief that made her think that making mistakes in public was something very embarrassing.

Instead of feeling embarrassed the question she should have asked herself is whether those people who were watching her do mistakes too or not.

This is an example of how false beliefs can shape our perception of the world and so our behavior.

If that girl understood that all human beings make mistakes and that her false belief makes no sense she would never feel embarrassed the next time she experiences the same situation.

Embarrassment and Lack of Self Confidence

Some people think that they are what they do and as a result believe that making mistakes makes them faulty and inadequate.

Those people depend on external factors to feel worthy and when they lose any of these external factors they lose their self confidence with it.

The same thing happened to that girl when she fell. Because a part of her self confidence was dependent on the fact that she was avoiding mistakes the first mistake made her feel worthless.

If embarrassment is a big problem for you then get a piece of paper now and write on it “If I don’t make mistakes then I am a perfect human and if i make mistakes then I am a human!!”

Read it several times a day until your subconscious mind absorbs it and the next time you will experience that embarrassing situation you won't feel embarrassed.

What if someone made fun of me??

”Hahahaahaha, omg that’s so funny the girl is covered in mud hahahahahaah”

Hopefully you won’t meet someone like that guy above :) but what if you met someone like him?
Simply go towards him and say the following in an assertive way

“Didn't you ever make a mistake before?”
“Haven't you ever fell down before?”
“Haven’t you ever mispronounced a word before?”
“You know that you did and you accepted what happened, so why aren’t you accepting it now?
“You have the right to laugh but the next time you make a mistake everyone will have the right to laugh at you too”

If he said anything but "sorry" send me a mail ;)

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