How to become more approachable

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

How to become more approachable

Many people feel unattractive when they find that they are not approached by others
some people try to approach others yet get negative response without knowing why they got it and as a result they start forming negative beliefs about themselves.

I am not writing this post just to let you know how to become more approachable but am also writing it to let you know how to get a positive response when you approach others.

The reason i am writing this article is to help you become more confident after you realize that the reasons you were being rejected have nothing to do with your personality but with the approach you were using. (see also Why was i rejected)

Tips to become more approachable

In order to become more approachable and in order to get a positive response when you approach others you must understand the following concepts very well:

  • Most people are like you: What does this mean? it means that most people fear rejections, want to feel accepted and feel happy when someone approaches them. The reason i began with this point is that incorrect perception of others is the root cause of most of the problems that happen when approaching them as you will see in the next few points
  • Are you approachable?: Whether you are approaching someone or whether you are being approached do you put in the mind that the person you are talking to is looking for signs of acceptance as well? do you forget to smile? do you tense up and frown? Most people make the mistake of appearing unfriendly when being approached or when approaching others because of mistakenly believing that this makes them appear less desperate. After all if i approached someone without smiling or if i didn't smile when someone approaches me then this means that i am not desperate to talk to him, right? In fact that's completely wrong!
  • Confident people are approachable: In the Solid Self confidence program i said that confident people smile often and use open body language gestures. As a result people feel comfortable around them and so they are approached more often! All people would like to minimize the risk of rejection and that's why they will approach the person who makes them feel comfortable the most. now when you frown in the face of people they will certainly feel uneasy and they will never think of approaching you
  • More perception problems: Peter knows how to pick good clothes but he has a low self esteem. Because Peter is always very well dressed some people become intimidated because of believing that he is too rich to talk to them. Peter on the other hand never smiles or takes open gestures because he doesn't think that people want to approach him. In such a case Peter didn't realize that appearing superior to people was the main reason that prevented them from approaching him. People on the other hand never noticed that the main reason peter picks such clothes is that he wants to be approached and accepted by others!!

Self confidence, perception and approaching others

As you can see you need to build self confidence in order to become more approachable. not because self confidence will make people approach you but because self confidence will make you feel comfortable being yourself and as a result people will feel comfortable around you.

Some people make the mistake of devaluing themselves by assuming that they are not interesting or attractive. As a result those people never attempt to approach others and they take body language gestures that discourages them.

In the end those people find that nobody approaches them and feel less confident.

People are just like you. The want to be accepted and loved. I know that there might be few insecure exceptions but the majority of people will be happy around a person who makes them feel wanted and comfortable.

Think about others before you think of yourself and you will become more approachable.

2knowmysef is not a complicated medical website nor a boring online encyclopedia but rather a place where you will find simple, to the point and effective information that is backed by psychology and presented in a simple way that you can understand and apply. If you think that this is some kind of marketing hype then see what other visitors say about 2knowmyself.

The Solid confidence program was launched by; the program will either help you become more confident or give you your money back.

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