In my previous article Why am i depressed i said that people get depressed when they lose hope in reaching something that they badly wanted.
This means that an unmet need won't result in depression unless the person believes that there is no hope in fulfilling this important unmet need. (see also Unmet needs psychology)
Do you know that maintaining a certain psychological identity can be an important need that could result in depression if it was not properly maintained?
Yes just as you have guessed, many people get depressed because they failed to maintain one of their important identities! Want to know more? Then read this article.
When Sam was young he always did better than his younger sibling in sports. Because he was raised that way he developed the psychological goal of always being the first. (see How childhood experiences affect adulthood & How birth order affects your life)
When Sam went to college he unconsciously tried to replicate the favorable conditions he used to live in when he was a child. In other words Sam tried to be the first in college as well without knowing that the main reason that was motivating him to be the first was his psychological identity he developed long ago.
Sam managed to be first by getting straight As each year and as a result he became extreemly happy. (see How to find true happiness in life to understand the connection between unmet needs and happiness).
But as soon as he graduated and started working he found himself depressed without knowing why!
Sam got depressed because the identity of being the first was no longer maintained as he turned out to be a normal employee in the company he worked at.
I know what came to your mind right now. Why don't Sam try to become the first in his company as well by being a manager for example?
The answer is very simple. Most people, including Sam, are not aware of any of the inner works of their subconscious minds.
Sam wasn't aware of his psychological identity even though it was the hidden force that stood behind his ambition. He also never understood the difference between the period of his life he spent at college and the period after his graduation.
Had he understood that he got depressed because he failed to maintain the important identity he always wanted to maintain he would have managed to develop a plan that would have helped him get over his depression.
In my book, The ultimate guide to getting over depression i said that depression always happens for a reason and once you manage to find the root cause for depression and deal with it then your depression will go away.
What about you?
Do you know anything about your important identities?
Do you want to be first as well? or do you want to the be the winner?
Do you want to be the unique or do you want to be the amusing?
Just as people get depressed when they fail to maintain positive identities they also get depressed when they develop negative ones.
Lets suppose that you were always the last one since your childhood and that you have never experienced real happiness before. If that was the case then by getting rid of the identity that you hate (the loser or the last one in this case) by succeeding in your life then you will certainly experience true happiness.
Do you know what the moral of this article was?
People who understand themselves well are less likely to get depressed and even when they get depressed they manage to find their way out.
The book The ultimate guide to getting over depression was released by 2knowmself, the book provides a 100% guarantee for feeling better else you will be refunded. 2knowmysef is not a complicated medical website nor a boring online encyclopedia but rather a place where you will find simple, to the point and effective information that is backed by psychology and presented in a simple way that you can understand and apply. If you think that this is some kind of marketing hype then see what other visitors say about 2knowmyself.
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