Why independent people hardly fall in love

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

Why love happens

All people fall in love, that's a part of human nature.
But am pretty sure you have that friend who falls in love very often and am also pretty sure you have that friend who rarely falls in love.

When i discussed the psychology of love earlier i said that there are so many factors that determine whether a person will fall in love with someone else or not. Some of those factors stem from the person's desires and needs while some others stem from the person's flaws.

Let me explain the difference. A woman might want to be with an intelligent man because she believes that this man can help her to live a better life. That's an example of a requirement that is based on a real need.

Another woman could want to be in a relationship as soon as possible because she feels worthless when she remains single. In such a case the requirement had nothing to do with a need as much as it has to do with a personal flaw.

This woman has a problem because she mistakenly believed that single people aren't as worthy as the ones in relationships.

So what does all this have to do with independence?

Lack of emotional independence can make a person fall in love very often.

Bad emotions are usually sent to us by our minds in order to motivate us to find a relief. A person who isn't emotionally independent might suffer as long as he is single. In other words this person will only find a relief when he gets into a relationship. See 5 signs you are a love addict.

Now the problem here is that this person will usually sacrifice his important needs and wants just to get into a relationship as fast as he can. And of course you can guess how the future of such relationship will be.

Why independent people hardly fall in love

Independent people are usually emotionally strong people who know what they want. An independent person will hardly get into a relationship to fill a certain void or because he can't handle loneliness. See how singles deal with loneliness.

In other words many people fall in love for reasons that have nothing to do with love such as the desire to eliminate emotional pain. Because independent people are usually used to living alone those kind of pressures can hardly influence their decisions and so they usually remain single until they find what they are looking for.

Independent people don't give in to the emotional pressures that force others to get into relationships fast. See 10 signs you are marrying the wrong person.

Confusing everything with love

In my book How to get over anyone in few days i said that so many people fail to recover from breakups because they confuse certain emotions with love. Some people confuse loneliness, the desire to be approved, the desire to feel worthy and many other emotions with love.

Those people usually fall for the wrong ones then believe that they found their soul mates only to discover later that they aren't happy with their relationships nor they are happy when they are single.

Independent people don't make those mistakes and this is why they hardly fall in love. I am talking about false love of course.

The book "How to get over someone in few days" was released by 2knowmyself, the book is a 100% guarantee that you will get over anyone else you will be refunded.

2knowmysef is not a complicated medical website nor it's a boring online encyclopedia but it's a place where you will find simple, to the point and effective information that is backed by psychology and that is presented in a simple and obvious way. If you think that this is some kind of marketing hype then see what other visitors say about 2knowmyself.

Want to know more?

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Why do we like the ones we see often

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