How to understand hidden intentions in humans

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

Bad intentions

The world has both good and bad people. That's a fact.
Some people tend believe everything that they see , which is not a bad thing, and as a result they assume that people don't have hidden intentions.

Let me first tell you that good people assume that others are like them and this is why they assume that no one has bad intentions. However in order to be realistic you have to realize that in some cases a person can do one thing but have a totally different goal.

Here is a very simple example. A man can give money to charity in order to seem generous to people. While it seemed like this person cared about the poor he actually cared about himself. See Why people behave the way they do.

Hidden intentions are everywhere. They can accompany words, actions, or even jokes.
I have said earlier in my article about jokes and politics that a person can share a joke in order to make fun of a certain political party. While the person might seem like he wants to have a laugh he might actually be trying to put the other party down.

A friend can give you advice in order to seem like he cares while in fact he might just want to prove himself superior to you. By simply having the upper hand through the advice he gives that person can feel more and in control around you. See How to give advice properly

More complex examples

Do you know that someone can be friends with another in order to elevate his self esteem?
In the Solid Self confidence program i said that a person might try to be around those who achieved less than him in life in order to always feel good about himself.

A person can become friends with people who have troubled lives in order to always feel that he is better when he is around them. See why humans strive for superiority.

A person can give religious advice to people who aren't as religious as him in order to feel that he is superior to them. That person can have the intention of boosting his self confidence by believing that he is unlike those sinners.

A person can ask you 'how are you doing' in order to grab some bad news about you that can help him feel good about himself. A jealous person or a hater is very likely to try to dig for your bad news in order to believe that he is good. See why some people are nosy.

A person can give you a biased advice in order to let you stop talking to a person he hates. For example if a friend of yours hates another friend then he might try to tell you that this person is bad in order to let you avoid them.

Human beings are complex

Human beings are complex. Yes it's a good thing to assume that people are good but this way of thinking can also result in serious problems. So how can you tell if a person is good or bad?

Knowing the intention behind a specific piece of advice might not be simple. After all you will hardly be able to tell the real intention behind a person's actions.

So what's the right thing to do?
The right thing to do is to first understand the forces that move that person. When you get a deep understanding of a person, his unmet needs, his unconscious desires and his psychological motives you will able to guess his intentions very easily.

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