why some men don't feel manly enough

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

Don't threaten me

First guy : Why are you looking at me this way?
Second guy: Huh?
First guy: You were staring at me moments ago.

does this conversation sound familiar?
It's a conversation that took place between two guys who don't know each other. The first was angry and hostile because he believed that the other one looked him straight into the eye on purpose.

In fact the second guy was just looking around randomly and he didn't even think about the first guy. For the first instance this might seem like a random event that happened for no reason but when digging deeper it became obvious that the first guy wasn't feeling manly enough and as a result he felt that his masculinity was threatened when the other guy looked him straight into the eye.

Men who are sure of their masculinity , and they are the minority, usually don't feel threatened or intimidated easily.

When a man feels powerful and in control he won't be very concerned about little events such as someone looking at him for he won't believe that those events represent a threat to his masculinity. See why women like men who lift heavy weights.

The not being man enough complex

While the situation described above might not happen often still this doesn't cancel the fact that so many men don't feel manly enough. As soon as a male child is born he gets bombarded with so many beliefs about masculinity and manhood.

While some of those beliefs are good some of them are very destructive. So many young men believe that they have to be bigger, taller or more masculine in order to be considered real men.

The short guy might feel inferior to tall ones, the small man might feel inferior to big ones and even the one with high pitched voice might feel inferior to those with low pitched voices.

As the young man grows his definition of masculinity usually narrows down to being big , muscular and attractive to women. Of course strength and power are very important traits that can make a man more attractive to the opposite sex but being a real man is much deeper than being tall, physically strong or having a deep voice.

In attempt to satisfy those superficial beliefs many men engage into wrong behaviors such as being overly aggressive, trying to pick fights with anyone or being players in order to compensate for their feelings of inferiority. See why are some people players.

Who is the real man?

Yes physical strength is important but it can be acquired easily. Any man can practice martial arts, go to the gym , commit for some time and end up being a strong fighter with big muscles.

But does this make that person a true man?
No, a true man is the one who fights for his dreams and values. A true man is the one who is brave enough to follow his dreams instead of running away from them. A true man is the one who doesn't run from his reality by using drugs , weed or even masturbating. See why many porn addicts are just looking for a mood fix.

A true man is the one who doesn't let anything stop him. A true man is the one who fights back, who stands up when he falls and who never gets broken.

A true man is the one who learns, develops himself, acquires the missing skills and achieves his goals.
There are so many tall, big, deep voiced guys who aren't real men from the inside.

Yes they can fight, yes they can look scary but deep within they are too scared of life that they decided to run away from it.

If you have got those looks then make sure you also match those looks by changing yourself from within and if you don't have the looks then you can still be a real man without having them.

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