Why some married people watch porn

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

It has nothing to do with sexual desire

In my previous article Why porn addiction has nothing to do with sexual desire i explained how most people confuse the real reasons behind porn addiction with sexual desire.

I have said earlier that reasons such as dopamine addiction, the desire to be more masculine and the desire to feel approved can all be among the causes for porn addiction. Had porn addiction been based on sexual desire a married person would have never watched porn. After all a married person can have sex anytime and if his sexual desire was really high as he thinks then he would have preferred real sex over porn. See How Porn addiction can lead to feelings of inferiority

The problem with married people who watch porn is that after some time they lose interest in their partners. I said before that when a person watches porn the chemical dopamine , which is released when a person expects a reward, is released by large amounts.

As the person keeps getting used to high levels of dopamine real sex starts to become less interesting. The problem with dopamine addiction is that the brain keeps getting used to certain levels of the chemical in such a way that it needs more of it in order to feel good.

In other words real sex might become much less enjoyable as a person watches porn.

What causes this problem

This kind of problem can usually begin even before marriage when a person becomes a porn addict in order to fix his mood, forget about his problems or compensate for the poor social life. As this addiction becomes stronger that person might believe that getting married will help him get over it. See Porn addiction can be connected to doubts about masculinity

When that person gets married and feels like watching porn he might blame their partner as a result of believing that porn is more interesting than them while in fact the problem in such a case is the strategy that person learned to deal with his unwanted problems.

If for example that person was using porn to forget about his problems then if a big problem happened in the absence of that person's partner then he might watch porn thinking that his sexual is actually high. See also Why masturbation will never help you release sexual frustration

This problem could also start after marriage for various reasons. A person for example could unconsciously feel like watching porn in order to seek vengeance against their partner. In such a case by doing something that could hurt their partner that person would be seeking revenge while blaming his sexual desire.

This problem can also happen if a person got married to someone they don't really like. In such a case that person would be using porn to look at images of people who resemble the one they wanted to be with.

The last case is a serious problem because the main reason that caused it is that the person got married to someone they don't really like. See also Porn addiction might be caused by a poor social life.

How to stop watching porn

In order to stop watching porn you need to realize that your addiction has nothing to do with sexual desire and that your mind is just blaming it to hide the real reasons from you. Those reasons could be anything including the ones described above.

Next you need to change your beliefs about porn addiction in order to realize that this habit can be broken if you decided to. Many porn addicts think that porn addiction can never be broken but as soon as they are introduced to the right facts they usually manage to recover from that addiction easily.

This is exactly why we created the the ultimate guide to breaking porn and masturbation addiction, which is a guide that can help you get over porn and masturbation addiction for good and in a short period of time.

2knowmysef is not a complicated medical website nor a boring online encyclopedia but rather a place where you will find simple, to the point and effective information that is backed by psychology and presented in a simple way that you can understand and apply. If you think that this is some kind of marketing hype then see what other visitors say about 2knowmyself.

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