3 steps to get over life's disappointments

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

Disappointment and false ideas about life

One of the popular reasons some people get really disappointed about life is that they don't know how life really works. If you think that good people don't get rejected, that great effort would be instantly recognized or that you will always be rewarded for the good things you do then think twice.

Life never moves in a straight line. Brilliant ideas can get rejected more than once before they become popular. So many famous products that people love today were initially rejected by a large number of people.

When you read about the success stories of famous people you will always find that those people got rejected so many times before they made it.

In other words, your first defense line against disappointment is a healthy belief system that helps you understand that its totally Ok to get disappointed few times before you actually make it.

Why do some people fail to get up after they get disappointed?

Imagine that the world's boxing champion kept punching you in the face every minute. When will recovery actually happen?

Recovery from the hits will start to happen when the hits are over. This means that as long as you are being hit every now and then it will be almost impossible for you to stand up again.

The same happens in real lie. As long as you are still attached to something that is causing you pain you will hardly recover. This is why in my book about breakups i said that loss of hope is the first step towards recovery.

When you lose hope your mind starts accepting what happened and recovery starts. Its as if you stopped receiving more hits.

Back in 2006 when i lost a significant amount of my money in the stock market i didn't start to feel good before i sold all my stocks. In other words, when daily losses stopped happening i started to recover.

Channel the energy

So many people do the mistake of never trying again after they partially recover from disappointments and this is why they never fully recover. In order to fully recover from life's disappointments you need to achieve the goals you were already after using different methods.

Lets suppose you wanted to be a writer and you submitted your first manuscript to a publishing house that rejected it. In such a case the only way to full recovery is to make sure that manuscript gets published somewhere else.

In my book About depression i said that depression happens when you lose hope in getting something that really matters to you. This is why you should start right away to find another way to get that thing that matters to you else you will become depressed.

How to get over life's disappointments

So how can these tips be implemented in real life to help you get over disappointments? here are the steps:

  • 1)Get the maximum damage: Make sure you get the maximum damage (receive all the hits) as fast as you can if possible. Living on little hope will only delay your recovery and prevent you from standing up again
  • 2) Start on the backup plan promptly: As soon as you accept what happened start right away on the backup plan. If you didn't take any steps your loss of hope will persist and turn into depression
  • 3) It might never work from the first attempt: Understand that life isn't like mathematics, 1+1 won't always lead to a 2 in real life. That's why you need to adjust your beliefs not to get disappointed if something unexpected happened

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