Why being single can make you stronger

By M.Farouk Radwan, MSc.

The connection between relationships and procrastination

Ever wondered why so many people procrastinate?
People procrastinate because they prefer to do anything that can provide them with a temporary relief even if that thing won't lead them to anything.

Now do you know that relationships can be some form of procrastination?
So many people run for relationships in order to cope with their problems. A typical person would prefer to do any task that can help him feel better over doing an unpleasant task that can help him solve his problems.

That's why many people get into relationships when life becomes tough, when they feel bad or when they can hardly cope. Relationships are great of course but when the main purpose of the relationship is running away from problems then two major problems usually happen.

The first is that a wrong partner choice is usually made because all a person cares about is getting into a relationship. And the second is that the problems never get solved but only grow bigger. See why you always fall in love with the wrong people.

Why being single can make you stronger

So what happens to the people who don't do so?
What happens to the people who don't choose to runaway to a relationship?

The first thing that happens to those people is that they feel the pain of their problems. So how can this be a good thing? Simply the brain uses bad emotions and emotional pain in order to motivate us to solve our problems.

When those people experience pain they find themselves motivated to change their lives and so their lives become better. In addition to that those people learn how to become more independent. As a result of being able to handle their important problems alone those people become more tolerant in the face of life problems.

In my previous article Why independent people hardly fall in love i said that those independent people are more likely to make the correct relationship choice since they go for the ones they really like and not the ones they need.

Liking someone is something but needing that person because you can't handle your own pain is a totally different thing. See also What is a love map?.

Staying single makes you immune to breakups

In my book How to get over anyone in few days i explained how relationship dependency can prevent people from recovering from breakups.

If a person can't live on his own because he never got used to dealing with his problems without a pain killer then this person will suffer a lot if he broke up. After all people suffer after breakups for many different reasons and of course one of those reasons is not being able to live alone. See Signs you are a love addict.

People who learn how to say single for some time become more immune to breakups as they don't dread being alone.
Finally when a person stays single for some time he learns about his true needs and manages to get more self understanding.

A person who spent some time alone is more likely to know what kind of partner he is looking for than a person who never dared to stay single even for a short period of time.

In short , being single isn't bad. In fact being single can make you stronger.

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Want to know more?

How do singles deal with loneliness

Why we get attracted to people when we are not single

Why do some men stay single

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